On the sofa with Gael - Part 3
Mister leather Belgium 2020, Gael, interviews some of the MSC Belgium members! Read the story of Bojan!
Gael: Hi Bojan. Good to have you for a coffee! Where does your name come from? For how long have you been living in Belgium and what made you move to Brussels?
Bojan: Indeed, my name has a Slavic origin, and it was quite popular in the 80’s in Slovenia where I was born. My family comes from a region near the Hungarian border, so besides Slovenian, Hungarian is also my mother tongue (although it got a bit rusty with years of not using it). After spending 10 years in Ljubljana during my university years of studying psychology and gaining my first work experience in a local LGBT organisation, I somehow felt it was time for new experience abroad. I met my boyfriend who lived in Brussels during a HIV conference in Glasgow we both attended in October 2016, and after a couple of months I ended up in Belgium. After few months of looking for a job, I got the opportunity for an internship at the European AIDS Treatment Group, which allowed me to continue working in the HIV field. I‘m still working there, as a Project Officer.
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“I met my boyfriend who lived in Brussels during a HIV conference in Glasgow and after a couple of months I ended up in Belgium”
Gael: For how long have you been in the fetish scene ? What is/are your main fetish(es).
“I always love to see when a person is wearing gear with pride”
Bojan: I’m not completely sure about the ‘scene’ part, but let’s say that I started discovering my fetishes quite early, somehow together with my coming out process during my adolescence. At the beginning I remember being more interested in rubber gear, but then my ‘taste’ evolved more into leather gear, which is somehow my main fetish. But of course, I like other things as well, and I always love to see when a person is wearing gear with pride.
Gael: How did you become a MSC member and when did that happen? Have you witnessed any changes since you are a member?
“I especially like the fetish socials as they are great for our community. I just hope the situation with COVID-19 will slowly calm down and we will be able to meet and socialize again”
Bojan: MSC Belgium was in a way my first official ‘scene’ (haha, I have some issues with that word, obviously). Before that - during my years in Ljubljana - I felt quite ‘lonely’ since there was no fetish scene, probably for two main reasons – small gay community in general, and probably also some internalized negative attitudes inside the community towards gear fetish in general. I think the first time I heard about MSC Belgium was at Stammbar (Brussels), where I chatted with a couple of members, but the turning point was when I met Bart who did a great job in approaching shy guys (yes, I am one of them, at least at the beginning, haha) and explaining a bit more about MSC Belgium. It didn’t take long after, and I remember bringing my subscription form to Frank last year during Darklands. I’m happy to see that there are many events organized by MSC Belgium, especially the fetish socials that I find great for our community. I just hope the situation with COVID-19 will slowly calm down and we will be able to meet and socialize again.
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“The reduced options we currently have during the lock-down somehow force us to reconnect with ourselves, and to start appreciating more the things that are around us and we usually ignore, or are just ‘too obvious’.”
Gael: How do you cope with COVID-19 restrictions and lockdown, and what do you miss the most?
Bojan: Surprisingly I have to say that it’s much better than expected. Just before the lock-down started, I was lucky enough to take a short break in New York, but on my way back (it was the Saturday after everything closed in Belgium) I knew that life would not be the same, at least for some period of time. But then I tried to keep myself occupied as much as possible – it was the perfect time to invest in my old hobby of playing the piano, there were some series I wanted to finish for a long time. I’m also going often for long walks... My simple explanation is that the reduced options we currently have somehow force us to reconnect with ourselves, and to start noticing (and appreciating) more the things that are around us and we usually ignore, or are just ‘too obvious’. But anyway, what I miss the most is probably the freedom of moving – to go for a day trip, to take a flight and visit my family, to go for a weekend trip somewhere in Europe... Fortunately it’s slowly but surely coming back, so I already started planning my summer trips (in the worst case, I will end up with bunch of flight vouchers I can use later 😊).
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“As long as I’m satisfied with my life, have a decent job and of course that I am surrounded by my friends and nice people, I will be happy in 10 years from now. ”
Gael: One last question. Where do you see yourself in 10 years ?
Bojan: That’s a tough one. Especially now when it’s difficult to plan even for the next couple of months, when there is always the fear that restrictions will come back at some point later this year, and also the thought of how fragile the world we live in is and how everything can change overnight. But in general, I am quite simple, as long as I’m satisfied with my life, have a decent job (hopefully with more counseling/direct work with users in the future), and of course that I am surrounded by my friends and nice people. But let’s schedule a follow-up interview in 10 years and see. 😊
